This one spoke STRAIGHT to my heart. Especially reflecting on being a child of God. My to list has a power over me that I have struggled to separate from. And your explanation of your experience helps me feel less alone. When I lean into my faith, it puts everything back into its right place. The trick is remembering to do this- over, and over, and over!
This gave me pause, as I cheerily crumpled today's pile of paper scraps listing one to-do per tiny scrap, and, with great satisfaction, tossed them in the bin. I like the idea of being okay with what's unfinished... that's a novel idea to me. But I equally lik celebrating how much I did do each day,
and noticing who I was being doing it. A system I'm practicing this spring (and have a long to go in making it a regular thing) is to put tasks and time blocks for doing these tasks on my digital calendar. Then each morning, I jot down my most 3-5 important priorities on little scraps of paper within view. As I finish a task, I note I my paper weekly planner what I completed (a running list of accomplishments ...a handwritten serotonin surge) and a short note or doodled emoji about how I felt doing. At the end of the day, I check if there's one carry-over task I can add to the top of the next day's list.
I love this Jenn. I have been experimenting with time blocking as well, and it mostly works for me! It helps me to "see" my day and be realistic about what I can accomplish. On days that I have a lot of meetings, I recognize that I don't have a lot of time for projects and to-dos. Time blocking give me permission to have more grace with myself.
Oh, Adair, this is liberation: "Time blocking give me permission to have more grace with myself." YES! And I think when seek (and reach) grace, we may also arrive to dignity, and dignity ushers in even more self compassion. Thank you for this conversation... it has me wondering in new directions with new perspectives.
My life coach said something to me this week that has been sticking to me— she said what if you experimented with doing nothing that you don’t want to do. I thought it was such a novel concept that I ponder whether or not I even think about it when I construct my to-do list. Productivity is like a cancer, crowding out all the cells of richness and joy and deep focus and attention on things that matter. At least that’s what I think today. I
I am obsessed with this idea - only doing what feels good! I've read about it before, and it lands true in my body BUT, it feels so scary. The only way I can conceive of doing this is to give myself a 30 day period to try it out and 'see what happens.' I would love to know how you've thought of approaching this!
Geez, I don’t even know that I’ve thought of a way to implement it. I think it’s more of like a stirring for me when something makes me annoyed or doesn’t sit well with me or I have plans I’ve made, but I don’t really wanna go do them and I feel this resistance. I think to myself “I don’t have to do this because I don’t want to do it.”
Just trying to give myself the freedom blow stuff off. Really it’s only been around social situations and life demands and productivity.
Was there a particular book or article or something that you read about the idea of implementing only things that feel good?
I think those of us "good girls" of a hypervigilant mindset will always feel the way you do. Now that I'm 71, it's gotten better, needless to say, after 50 years of self-development and introspection! Now I have to be hypervigilant not to be so hard on myself and be okay with where I am, today, now. You, you've got this. Your honesty with yourself and your openness to share with us is commendable. You're quite an amazing person. Respect!
First, I think of Kurt Vonnegut's quote: "I am a human being, not a human doing".
Next, as a child of god, living in this life now, we are but a speck in time. I feel that all that we are really here to do is be kind, love, and grow in Earth School. You are doing that in spades. And as I see it, when you are given a gift, it's a gift to be given. You are using your gifts, as is Jon, in so many ways. If you accomplished nothing else in your life, you are doing so much for so many now. Not to mention the most important job of raising kids in a loving blended family. That in itself is more than enough.
That said, I have to remind myself of what you're saying regularly, as I am always behind and always expecting more of myself.
Here's to us, here's to all of us, here's to undone lists, and here's to JOY!
This one spoke STRAIGHT to my heart. Especially reflecting on being a child of God. My to list has a power over me that I have struggled to separate from. And your explanation of your experience helps me feel less alone. When I lean into my faith, it puts everything back into its right place. The trick is remembering to do this- over, and over, and over!
You are right! Doing it over and over again is the trick (and the hard part!).
Like everything, it's a practice. Me too. Over and over and over again.
This gave me pause, as I cheerily crumpled today's pile of paper scraps listing one to-do per tiny scrap, and, with great satisfaction, tossed them in the bin. I like the idea of being okay with what's unfinished... that's a novel idea to me. But I equally lik celebrating how much I did do each day,
and noticing who I was being doing it. A system I'm practicing this spring (and have a long to go in making it a regular thing) is to put tasks and time blocks for doing these tasks on my digital calendar. Then each morning, I jot down my most 3-5 important priorities on little scraps of paper within view. As I finish a task, I note I my paper weekly planner what I completed (a running list of accomplishments ...a handwritten serotonin surge) and a short note or doodled emoji about how I felt doing. At the end of the day, I check if there's one carry-over task I can add to the top of the next day's list.
I love this Jenn. I have been experimenting with time blocking as well, and it mostly works for me! It helps me to "see" my day and be realistic about what I can accomplish. On days that I have a lot of meetings, I recognize that I don't have a lot of time for projects and to-dos. Time blocking give me permission to have more grace with myself.
Oh, Adair, this is liberation: "Time blocking give me permission to have more grace with myself." YES! And I think when seek (and reach) grace, we may also arrive to dignity, and dignity ushers in even more self compassion. Thank you for this conversation... it has me wondering in new directions with new perspectives.
My life coach said something to me this week that has been sticking to me— she said what if you experimented with doing nothing that you don’t want to do. I thought it was such a novel concept that I ponder whether or not I even think about it when I construct my to-do list. Productivity is like a cancer, crowding out all the cells of richness and joy and deep focus and attention on things that matter. At least that’s what I think today. I
loved your piece. Welcome back to your Substack.
I am obsessed with this idea - only doing what feels good! I've read about it before, and it lands true in my body BUT, it feels so scary. The only way I can conceive of doing this is to give myself a 30 day period to try it out and 'see what happens.' I would love to know how you've thought of approaching this!
Geez, I don’t even know that I’ve thought of a way to implement it. I think it’s more of like a stirring for me when something makes me annoyed or doesn’t sit well with me or I have plans I’ve made, but I don’t really wanna go do them and I feel this resistance. I think to myself “I don’t have to do this because I don’t want to do it.”
Just trying to give myself the freedom blow stuff off. Really it’s only been around social situations and life demands and productivity.
Was there a particular book or article or something that you read about the idea of implementing only things that feel good?
Adair, I couldn't love this anymore.
I think those of us "good girls" of a hypervigilant mindset will always feel the way you do. Now that I'm 71, it's gotten better, needless to say, after 50 years of self-development and introspection! Now I have to be hypervigilant not to be so hard on myself and be okay with where I am, today, now. You, you've got this. Your honesty with yourself and your openness to share with us is commendable. You're quite an amazing person. Respect!
First, I think of Kurt Vonnegut's quote: "I am a human being, not a human doing".
Next, as a child of god, living in this life now, we are but a speck in time. I feel that all that we are really here to do is be kind, love, and grow in Earth School. You are doing that in spades. And as I see it, when you are given a gift, it's a gift to be given. You are using your gifts, as is Jon, in so many ways. If you accomplished nothing else in your life, you are doing so much for so many now. Not to mention the most important job of raising kids in a loving blended family. That in itself is more than enough.
That said, I have to remind myself of what you're saying regularly, as I am always behind and always expecting more of myself.
Here's to us, here's to all of us, here's to undone lists, and here's to JOY!
I appreciate your perspective so much and your compliments. And I agree! Here's to the undone lists and to JOY!